[Learned something? Has he? Tenka blinks slowly as he recalls something that he'd told Shirasu before on one of his birthdays. "It's why leaving people behind and getting left behind hurt so much I can barely breathe." It makes him stiffen slightly because does Sousei think the decision to leave the Yamainu was easy when Tenka barely even considers it a decision?
At the time, he'd never felt that that he had any other choice, but does he have the right to say that to someone that he abandoned?
To that, Tenka just chuckles quietly. It is subdued and not at all like his usual laughter, but rather a weak attempt at making things okay again, just as he adds softly.]
If you think I found any abandonment was easy, you're wrong.
[He was an idiot for making the choice to leave the Yamainu. Kiiko said it. Even as they were barely out the door, Tenka agreed.
.... But haven't they talked about it enough? Or maybe not even close. Either way, Sousei is pressing Tenka to continue on and... well, he does. He breathes and shakes his head slowly.]
And then we lived as a family. I had a girlfriend once. She broke up with me.
One of the doctors from the secret government division became my personal doctor to give me the Orochi medicine as well as suppressors to try to slow the effects. These too. [He points at the neck brace and gestures to his wrists.]
Soramaru went to school and got tired of it so Shirasu is teaching him now. Chuutarou's going to school now but his marks aren't that good - he needs to study harder.
Shirasu has been helping me find a way to separate the Orochi from the vessel, he's the only one I told about it. My brothers never even heard the word before I...
[he trails off and shrugs]
I go to fancy parties in Kyoto sometimes? They're awful. Really tiring and way too high-maintenance for me.
[It's a lot of information all at once, but ten years is a little hard to really go over once he hit all the major things, Tenka thinks. They were a great ten years as far as he's concerned, filled with laughter and only the occasional hiccup where he had a doctor's appointment or struggled with their Orochi research. And then-]
But I made the bargain with the government before I came back the first time. [Before he split up from the Yamainu.] I could keep on using the Orochi medicine if they could collect data from me and experiment on my body. Then once my mind was devoured by the cells, I'd be executed by the government and my body would be used for further research.
[That didn't happen. But that at least brings them up to speed.]
The fact that I'm alive is as weird to me as it is to you.
no subject
At the time, he'd never felt that that he had any other choice, but does he have the right to say that to someone that he abandoned?
To that, Tenka just chuckles quietly. It is subdued and not at all like his usual laughter, but rather a weak attempt at making things okay again, just as he adds softly.]
If you think I found any abandonment was easy, you're wrong.
[He was an idiot for making the choice to leave the Yamainu. Kiiko said it. Even as they were barely out the door, Tenka agreed.
.... But haven't they talked about it enough? Or maybe not even close. Either way, Sousei is pressing Tenka to continue on and... well, he does. He breathes and shakes his head slowly.]
And then we lived as a family. I had a girlfriend once. She broke up with me.
One of the doctors from the secret government division became my personal doctor to give me the Orochi medicine as well as suppressors to try to slow the effects. These too. [He points at the neck brace and gestures to his wrists.]
Soramaru went to school and got tired of it so Shirasu is teaching him now. Chuutarou's going to school now but his marks aren't that good - he needs to study harder.
Shirasu has been helping me find a way to separate the Orochi from the vessel, he's the only one I told about it. My brothers never even heard the word before I...
[he trails off and shrugs]
I go to fancy parties in Kyoto sometimes? They're awful. Really tiring and way too high-maintenance for me.
[It's a lot of information all at once, but ten years is a little hard to really go over once he hit all the major things, Tenka thinks. They were a great ten years as far as he's concerned, filled with laughter and only the occasional hiccup where he had a doctor's appointment or struggled with their Orochi research. And then-]
But I made the bargain with the government before I came back the first time. [Before he split up from the Yamainu.] I could keep on using the Orochi medicine if they could collect data from me and experiment on my body. Then once my mind was devoured by the cells, I'd be executed by the government and my body would be used for further research.
[That didn't happen. But that at least brings them up to speed.]
The fact that I'm alive is as weird to me as it is to you.